Anonymous: I received a kiss from a parrot birb at niagra falls ten years ago and now am MUCH FOOF and green and pink in the hair area. the pink GLOWS underneath UV light. I am wondering if this is a delayed reaction to the birb smooch and am I now Peter Parker, but instead of SpiderMan ParrotWoman??


You have becam the Grande Responsible adn now must gain powers of can bite a thign and upsideown with hold on with a toes


literally all i want is to fall asleep on someone

that’s it

that’s all

i’m very tired and i want to lay my head on someone’s stomach and have them run their fingers through my hair and sleep


It’s 2089. all cops have been replaced by genetically modified dogs that let children pet them, help old ladies cross the street, chase down criminals, never eat donuts, bark at cat-callers, analyze dna, easily track down murders, pee on white collar criminals, and tear the faces off of rapists. utopia has been reached. 


do you ever just want to hold someone in your arms for about 37 years

(Source: worldpeaces)